Intentional Living: The danger of momentum

Intentional Living by Em Capito, LCSWWe tend to accept some unintentional, automatic routes in our lives.

Those decisions might be continuing to live where you were born, snoozing your alarm clock every morning, wolfing down dinner in front of a sitcom every night, or guarding your lane from any would-be infiltrators while driving.

We have an opportunity to make radically intentional shifts at any given time. 

We don’t have to wait until we are so uncomfortable that we are forced to change, like when the doctor says your heart is going to give out, your partner leaves you, or you lose it at your miserable job and tell your boss exactly where he can go.

Where are you mindlessly saying yes as momentum ticks off the days of your life? 

If you really honored what feels right for you, what would you quit? 

Some favorite un-missed relics from my no-more pile: bleaching my hair, slacks, earning love, networking events, working late into the night, mandatory meetings, bosses, daily commutes, and toxic people.

Saying no can be as liberating as saying yes, and often just as difficult when breaking out of the easier pattern to live each day of your life intentionally.  

“Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.”​ – Anna Taylor

2 Comments
  1. Can I just quote tweet this entire post, Em?

    “We don’t have to wait until we are so uncomfortable that we are forced to change, like when the doctor says your heart is going to give out, your partner leaves you, or you lose it at your miserable job and tell your boss exactly where he can go.”

    It’s sad to admit that so many of the big changes in my life happened at the moments where I was forced to change. My addiction forced me to look in the mirror and make changes: to who I lived with and hung out with, what I put in my body, how I spent all my time. I didn’t get off the teaching career path until I was so stressed out that I was losing weight and painfully depressed.

    Of course, it didn’t HAVE to be that way. I could have taken a million different opportunities to say ‘no’ and change direction.

    “If you really honored what feels right for you, what would you quit? ”

    I think I know. The doing is the hard part.

    1. You’re the best, DB40! I so appreciate your thoughtful digestion of these concepts and the value you add to the conversation.

      I like to think that the aim is incrementally better awareness of our momentum, such that we can intervene just a bit sooner over time, accept sunk costs more readily, and get on with the work of reinventing ourselves where needed.

      I’ve often been the frog sitting in the pot of nearly boiling water hoping that conditions will improve, or more accurately telling myself that I must improve. The great unknown is outside that familiar pot, and most certainly more pots. I find the knowing the hardest part. After that, the doing is inevitable. It may take time and boiling water to accept, but I can’t un-know what I now know 😉

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